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Colgate's "The Closer I Get To You The More You Make Me Smile"
Someone should've lost their job for pitching that idea.
Old Navy's "Super Flirt"
It's bad enough MC Lyte is moonlighting as a rapper again telling females to "bust a tunic" already but this commercial was the straw that broke the camel's back. I remember the very first time I saw it during an episode of I Love the 80's I couldn't believe my ears. Four overly elated white women (plus one token nigga) dancing around in those bohemian skirts made both my eyes and ears bleed. I turned around to face the television screen and then thought out loud "no no no no no, they're butchering a classic!".
The Niggar Family Loves Wal Mart
I'm from Smallsville, Georgia so the local Wal Mart is basically the mall down here. At any given time you can go to Wal Mart and see half of your graduating class from high school. Its sad but its the truth. Anyways, in the commercials for Wal mart they advertise the stores as being an organize store you can take care of all of your shopping needs. Which is true but its a total fabrication of how the actual stores usually are. Screaming babies, long lines, rude cashiers (you went to high school with, see how that works?), and old people who always run their carts into your heels. Whenever I shop at Wal Mart I have to put my game face on because there is no telling if Fresh is going to have to choke a bitch.
Wac Arnold's Fruit Buzz
First of all let me say that's I'm not spending $4 on some shit I can make myself for two dollars cheaper. This is yet another example of a product being able to take all your stress away. Who knew that your day could go by so smoothly by just relaxing with your girls in the backyard munching on overpriced grapes and yogurt?
CONTACT INFORMATION
Use don't abuse (ie. adding me to your site's mailing list). And for the love of God please stop sending mp3 files of your music. I am not Clive Davis and to be frank I probably don't want to hear the shit anyway. You should also know that I take my slow, precious time responding to email. And sometimes I don't respond at all. Fresh.crunkjuice@gmail.com
Fresh@myspace.com
